The Mask

Random Fact: I have a hard time with party favors. Both offering and receiving.
I like movies, so you might notice a trend in my postings. As in I will reference them. So here is today's movie reference. Did you ever see the movie The Mask? It starred Jim Carrey before he tried to be a 'serious' actor and Cameron Diaz when she was young enough to be considered a bomb shell and didn't look like a skeleton. It was a funny movie. Lots of quips and laughs. The premise of the movie was there is a shy guy who liked a pretty girl. The shy guy finds an ancient artifact allowing him to become outspoken and fun. Doing outrageous antics and being smooth so he can win his lucky lady. Bad guy boyfriend gets jealous, steals the mask good and evil duke it out for both the girly and to save the world. The End.

This transition was a little obvious, but I didn't want you to miss it. How often do I do this? Put on a mask and try to become who others want me to be? I used to do it all the time. It doesn't happen so much any more because God has been teaching me about His love for me and the desire He has for me to be who God created me to be. I had been so busy wearing a mask of 'what I should be' I was missing out on what I COULD be.
This morning I will be co-leading a Bible study. My mentor sent me a text with these words, they were just what I needed to hear about being authentic.
To leaders, If you are on a stage and you aren't honest and transparent then you're not a leader you're an actor.
- @JeffersonBethke

Those words hit me between the eyes. SO often I try and guess what people want to hear when I say things. SO often I get it all wrong. What the Lord has slowly been revealing to me is to stop trying to be something I am not. It's exhausting, embarassing, and leaves me with an icky feeling in the pit of my stomach that someone is going to find out what I am REALLY like.
As always, God's way is easy. His yoke is light. God created me for a purpose, but I can't do that if I am running around to be someone other than who God wants me to be. He is teaching me about who I am. I am His daughter, I am likeable, I don't have to pretend. I have skillz, people. That's right, I used a 'z'

It's not just me that He wants to teach these things to. God wants you to be you. Your kids to be who He wants them to be. God desires us to be authentic and real with ourselves and each other.
We can do it! With God's grace, all things are possible!
Where do you struggle in this? Is it easy for you to be you? Or do you want to be someone/thing else?
Blessings
-K

Friends

Hello Friends!

It's Tuesday. I think this might be my favorite day of the week. I have gotten thru the transition back into the week. The wear and tear of the daily grind hasn't pounded me down into a fine pulp, yet. There are no activities in the evening. It's a light homework day. Tuesday is an all around good day of the week.

What is on my mind today? Friends. Friendship, how do we attain that? I know others write about this and I am going to bring in some thoughts that I have heard over the years. I'll also tell you why I found friends to be so important.

Let's begin by being clear on what a friend is. It's not someone that Facebook suggests to you because you might share an acquaintance with some one. Those are acquaintances. They are people you might meet at a baby shower for the shared friend. They are not people you would call at the last minute to watch your children. A friend, a true friend is someone you spend time with. Face to face. Not face to Facebook.

Friends can be tricky, everyone has an opinion on how you should be a friend. Some people like to have a conversation over the phone with friends every few days, others can go months without seeing someone but than meet up and share an experience together and everything seems the same. Other people like to give and receive from their friends, other people do things for their friends. Friends come in all shapes and sizes.

Well, gee Ms. Katie, that's great. But how do I make friends? This is going to be life changing, wait for it... wait for it..... leave your house.

I am an outgoing person. I like to be with people. As stated in another post, I talk to strangers at the super market and park. I give advice to people at Redbox. At restaurants. Really anytime I over hear or see some one deliberating over a choice I will chime in. I regularly give my email and phone number to other moms I meet at play places or the park. But that wasn't always the case. I mean, I have always been outgoing, but I used to hold back from extending myself to strangers. Because it can be weird or awkward. I am sure there are people I have given my opinion to that would have preferred I just keep my mouth shut about what they should have for lunch. Or maybe they didn't want to know what I thought about their movie choice. But I wouldn't have the group of friends I have today if I hadn't been willing to introduce myself to people I didn't know. And then once the intros were made invite them to the park. Or exchange email addresses and have someone over to my house.

I know it can be scary and intimidating to introduce yourself to others. It's so much easier to just ignore the other mom at the play place or the library that has a child close in age to yours. We have things to do and places to be. I get that. But I think we can do it.  Friendships enrich our lives. It's been proven that we live longer and healthier lives with friends. We need people to hang out with. Facebook is not enough. We miss out on something when we don't share our lives with those outside our family circle.

I challenge you today to introduce yourself to someone you don't know. If you feel really brave, exchange email addresses and send an email to them when you get home about how much you enjoyed meeting them. If you really did enjoy the time with them, if not that's ok too.

Have a great Tuesday!

Blessings

-K

The Body

This past weekend the community I attend church with was hit by some tragic events. Things that are soul shattering. The type of event that will change how one looks at the world.

Amidst all of the hurt and pain I was blessed to be a part of the Body. The church Body. Where  a group of people who are all dedicated to serving God and His people rise up and meet the needs of those that are hurting. It was awe inspiring to be a part of something GOOD the church was doing. I kept thinking of the verse in John 13:35. ^34-35"Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other." Love was acted out this weekend and continues to be acted out as it is needed.

The Church is so beautiful when it steps up to the call God gives it. When the body of Christ reaches out to the hurting world, that's when lives are changed. We have such an opportunity to help. I know it's easier to ignore the hurt. The number of hurts in our world is overwhelming. But if we each did just the part God has put on our hearts to do, I bet we could make a huge dent in it. When you add the power of the Holy Spirit, think how mind blowing that could be!

It's scary to reach past oneself. To give of yourself requires trust and faith. With reaching out there is a chance you could be wounded. And if you are trusting in a human to reward you for reaching out, you will probably be disappointed. But that's not why God has put us here on earth together. We don't reach out so others can pat us on the back. We reach out to share God's love. To meet the needs of those who aren't in a place to take care of themselves.

Life is meant to be shared. Let's share the good and the bad. We need each other to live life.
Blessings
-K

The Choice

Random Fact: I am a part of a woven family. Meaning there is a history of many different individuals joining together to make up my family. Marriages that were broken became repaired, siblings that were lost have been found. And friends that have joined with me to make up my family. All joined together thru the saving power of Jesus.

Now, on to the post.

Did you ever think life should go a certain way? As in, this is how things should of gone? Or maybe this could have happened, but you aren't quite sure why it didn't? There is even what would have happened. Like, what would have happened if I had made this choice instead of the choice that had been made. I used to wallow in this. I was (ok, probably still am) very good and looking back on life and wishing I had made different choices.

To a certain degree, that's alright. But when my whole life is spent looking backwards, I miss what is right there in front of me. The now, the present. Which, with three kids isn't always where I want to be (since I am being so honest). It is, however, where I need to be. If I am looking at the past, I can get depressed over the missed opportunities, maybe not very wise choices and wrong decisions. These mistakes that I am still paying for. It's easy to stay there, to wallow. Again, that's not where I should stay though. There is no joy or abundant life in the past. Yes, there are lessons to be learned and the realization that I am so great at choosing poorly when I only consult my own counsel.

Joy, that comes in the now. In the daily thanking of God for all that I have. Even the stuff I don't particularly want to be in my life right now.Joy is a decision. An attitude that can be worn. I picture it as a soft, lilac colored sweater. I wish it was always easy to choose joy. Honestly, most days it's easier to choose discontent. Wearing discontent is like putting on the ugly, piled and misshapen sweater I have had since college. The article of clothing my husband shudders to see.

I was visiting my parents and siblings over the Labor Day weekend. It was beautiful where we were. At the end of our family picnic, we gathered around one of our own and prayed for them. As my dad was praying he said, "Lord, we thank-you for the blessings that are gonna come out of this. We don't know what they are, but we thank-you." That prayer is one of the reasons I love my dad so much. And it's so true. Thankfulness, counting on the promise that God works all things for the GOOD of those who love Him. This is the prayer I have for my life. That I would rest in the promises God has for me.

Part of being in the present is acting too. I don't just sit in my faith. Faith without works is dead. I need to be walking forward. Yes, there are moments of rest. And there will be moments of frenetic activity, but most of the time it's the daily working out of my faith that builds up my endurance. Praying over my kids and husband as I make their lunches. Lifting up scripture promises for a hurting friend. Sending a note of encouragement to someone. Intentionally looking for opportunities to serve in the community This is how I go forward in my faith.

It's how you can go forward to. The daily march of going forward with life.

What holds you back from choosing joy? What article of clothing would you describe joy as?

Blessings
-K

When Junk tries to be pretty

Random Fact: My favorite candy bar is the Hershey's symphony bar.

I went to the movies the other day. I purchased my elephant sized popcorn and a drink my toddler could swim in along with a package of chocolate covered peanuts. I wandered into the theater and performed a few Olympic worthy leaps and bounds to get to my seat. I settled down with all my indulgences and began opening my package of chocolate covered deliciousness. If you have ever counted calories, dieted or denied your self junk food for the sake of health, than you understand how excited I was to open my treat. Imagine my complete disappointment when I looked at the back of the package to check the calories per serving (it's a habit I just can't break) and discovered that my 'treat' was actually part of a healthy and balanced diet! There are in fact FIVE WHOLE GRAMS of protein in this package of candy. Making it far superior to other lesser candies. Because this candy was part of a healthy and balanced diet. Really? Because I thought I was having candy. As in the stuff that rots your teeth and makes my children turn into gremlins?

Apples, carrots, broccoli, yogurt, chocolate covered peanuts. Which of the previous doesn't belong? I'm going with chocolate covered peanuts. I don't care how Nestle' tries to pretty up the fact, a chocolate covered anything is dessert. I am fully aware that I am eating candy. I like to eat candy. I do not need the food industry to make me feel better about eating junk food. It's supposed to be junk. Not something I eat all the time, just something that is enjoyed from time to time. Like at the movies, or with my girlies when we go away for awhile.

It's the same thing with chips. My family and I were at a grocery store in the chip aisle. The chip aisle! The home of salt and high cholesterol. One of the chip makers was advertising multi-grain chips. And these weren't tortilla chips, they were potato chips. Why, I ask, why? Because when I dip my multigrain chips into french onion chip dip I am making a healthy food choice? NO! Does the food industry really think we are that incompetent that I will believe chips are a healthy choice? If I am in the chip aisle, I can guarantee you I am not there because I want to be making a healthy choice.

I know there are better choices when it comes to snacking, but sometimes I like to eat junk. I enjoy the combination of salty and sweet that comes from combining a bowl of popcorn with a box of whoppers. I don't do this all the time, just occasionally. Probably more often than I should, but that is a choice that I am making. Thanks for trying to make me feel better about it junk food makers, but part of the enjoyment is indulging in something just not that good for me.

What's your favorite junk food?
Blessings
-K

Tick Tock

Random fact about me: Though I am a Christian, I do not usually listen to the Christian radio station. There are a few different reasons. The main one is that I like variety in my music choices. We usually listen to Pandora or iTunes mixes.

 Now, on to the post. The above title is not a reference to a biological clock. It's an allusion to timing. Knowing when to take or refuse the job offer or when to invest and when to hold back. When should I leave the house so I don't have to wait in the car line? These are all issues of timing.

 I like to be on time. I actually prefer to be early. That way you don't miss anything. I don't interrupt the program happening. It's good for me to be on time. With each child I have had, there is an awkward period of about 4 months when I can not make it on time to places. This causes me stress, which in turn causes my family stress. Last summer we had our third child. She came into our lives all cuddly newborn. With her sweet smiles and gentle coos it was easy to while away the hours conferring with the flowers. (Wizard of Oz anyone?) Then school started about a month after she was born. School starting means we have to be somewhere on time. I didn't just have one child to get read and the others could just wear pjs, I had to have two children ready. With all their stuff. Plus the baby. Needless to say, I was late more the first month of that school year than I have ever been in my life. I wasn't just late getting to school, I was also late picking up from school. I know the first two months have planted the seeds of urgency in my children because now they ask, "Are we late?' when they hear the pitch of my voice raise as we are leaving the house. I wish this wasn't the case. I really wish I could just relax about things. That I didn't create anxiety disorders in my children because of my idiosyncracies. But I am not that way.

Why do I like to be on time? Probably because of my parents. Yes, that's always a good plan. Blame the parents. It's how God made me. To be early. And some of us have to be that way. Because if we were all the same, life would be boring. I would have no one to tut at for arriving late. Or no reason to use my phone to text someone when they aren't at our destination.

 If you aren't wired like me and tend to have the opposite issue, than take a look at a few things we do to help get to where we need to be. Here are some things I take into consideration when leaving the house.
       1. For each child you have, count back twenty minutes before you have to leave for those that are under the age of 5. You can count back ten minutes for those over five.
      2. Make your kids get their own stuff if they are able. Yes they will ask you where things are, but if they are taking care of it, they should remember where it is. This takes a few weeks for everyone to adjust to this system.
    3. A trip to the store always takes at least 20 minutes. If you have more than one child with you that can talk it probably will take five times that amount.
    4. Pumping gas takes time. It is not an instantaneous errand. Plan another 10 minutes if you want to do this on your way to someplace else.
    5. Driving takes time. Again, you cannot leave for your destination at the time your event begins and expect to arrive before it starts. It is physically impossible.

That's it, there's one of my quirks and the tips I have for you today. Are you a late person or an early person? Or maybe you are a right on time person. Let me know!
Blessings -K

Friends

Hello Friends!
It's Tuesday. I think this might be my favorite day of the week. I have gotten thru the transition back into the week. The wear and tear of the daily grind hasn't pounded me down into a fine pulp, yet. There are no activities in the evening. It's a light homework day. Tuesday is an all around good day of the week.
What is on my mind today? Friends. Friendship, how do we attain that? I know others write about this and I am going to bring in some thoughts that I have heard over the years. I'll also tell you why I found friends to be so important.
Let's begin by being clear on what a friend is. It's not someone that Facebook suggests to you because you might share an acquaintance with some one. Those are acquaintances. They are people you might meet at a baby shower for the shared friend. They are not people you would call at the last minute to watch your children. A friend, a true friend is someone you spend time with. Face to face. Not face to Facebook.
Friends can be tricky, everyone has an opinion on how you should be a friend. Some people like to have a conversation over the phone with friends every few days, others can go months without seeing someone but than meet up and share an experience together and everything seems the same. Other people like to give and receive from their friends, other people do things for their friends. Friends come in all shapes and sizes.
Well, gee Ms. Katie, that's great. But how do I make friends? This is going to be life changing, wait for it... wait for it..... leave your house.
I am an outgoing person. I like to be with people. As stated in another post, I talk to strangers at the super market and park. I give advice to people at Redbox. At restaurants. Really anytime I over hear or see some one deliberating over a choice I will chime in. I regularly give my email and phone number to other moms I meet at play places or the park. But that wasn't always the case. I mean, I have always been outgoing, but I used to hold back from extending myself to strangers. Because it can be weird or awkward. I am sure there are people I have given my opinion to that would have preferred I just keep my mouth shut about what they should have for lunch. Or maybe they didn't want to know what I thought about their movie choice. But I wouldn't have the group of friends I have today if I hadn't been willing to introduce myself to people I didn't know. And then once the intros were made invite them to the park. Or exchange email addresses and have someone over to my house.
I know it can be scary and intimidating to introduce yourself to others. It's so much easier to just ignore the other mom at the play place or the library that has a child close in age to yours. We have things to do and places to be. I get that. But I think we can do it.  Friendships enrich our lives. It's been proven that we live longer and healthier lives with friends. We need people to hang out with. Facebook is not enough. We miss out on something when we don't share our lives with those outside our family circle.
I challenge you today to introduce yourself to someone you don't know. If you feel really brave, exchange email addresses and send an email to them when you get home about how much you enjoyed meeting them. If you really did enjoy the time with them, if not that's ok too.
Have a great Tuesday!
Blessings
-K